Monday, December 12, 2011

Your Singular Holiday

source:  the green gal,

Over the last couple of weeks, I've had passing conversations with women--some single, one not--who have groaned at the thought of the holidays.  Their reaction implied that the holidays were to be endured instead of enjoyed.  As for myself, I'm slightly looking forward to the holidays.  While I've probably missed most of the holiday sales and I'm not wearing reindeer-embossed sweaters, I am upbeat about having time off and visiting family during the holidays.

If you're dreading spending the holidays alone, then here are some suggestions on making your holidays blissful instead of blah-ful.   Please, note I know that not all singles are spending the holidays alone and some that are may welcome the calm and quiet.  OK, onto the tips..

1.  Spend 10 minutes, brainstorming what you appreciate about yourself.  You could make categories such as:  Physical, Emotional, Special Quirks, Memorable Triumphs, Accomplishments, Compliments Received and list your positives under each category.  When you're feeling down, you can read the list to remember your cool qualities.

2.  Be aware that it's your choice to enjoy the holidays or not.  Perhaps you do need a time-out or a pity-party for yourself.  If so, then go for it but be careful to not overindulge.  Even better, you can have your pity-party before the holidays and then enjoy the holidays with a renewed sense of energy.

3.  Get some fresh air.  I live in California so it's pretty simple for me to tack this one on.  By going outside and walking you'll be energizing your body instead of stewing at home. 

4.  Connect with other singles.  No, I don't mean online dating although I know that option's available.  Instead, read blogs by singles so that you can realize that you're not completely alone.  You could also host a party or plan an outing with other single friends/relatives.

5.  If you're missing the holidays, then why not make your place more festive?  You can rent holiday music and movies from the library, buy a special mug, a holiday card or candles.  If you're living alone, you've got full run of the place and can make your place as festive as you wish,

6.  Journaling/venting.  I like to journal but some people may have other ways of releasing emotional stress.  If journaling, drawing, singing or dancing helps you to unleash your emotions then do one of those activities.  Sometimes feeling down can be a way of bringing to your attention to an experience/feeling that needs attention.  Appreciate the time and the opportunity that you have to self-reflect.

If the idea of doing the above activities, annoys you or simple doesn't suit you.  No worries.  You have to discover what works best for you.  Maybe you want to lay in bed during the holidays or you want to spend time volunteering.  That's perfectly fine.

This is your life

What I hope for is that you empower yourself by being aware of when you are choosing to be in a down mood.  Being alone for the holidays should not be equated to being unhappy during the holidays.  You can choose to relish or dread the holidays.  If you're choosing to dread the holidays, then compassionately acknowledge that.  Don't heighten your "bad" mood by feeling bad about feeling bad.

All right, I'm off my soapbox.  : ) 

Do you intend to enjoy or endure the holidays?  Feel free to post a question or comment below.  Your feedback is appreciated.

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